Tarot and Ritual to Process Grief

This month on Little Red Tarot I discuss how to name and process grief as well as integrate it's lessons: Sunday Spread, Letting Go and Leveling Up.

Sunday Spread: Ring of Fire

My self-care column Sunday Spread: Simple Tips for Not So Simple Lives starts today on Little Red Tarot! I feel really lucky to be part of this growing alternative tarot landscape, and really believe in the access it gives us to be active agents in our own healing. Come join me once a month on Little Red Tarot for the Sunday Spread and be on the look out for more ways to queer the process here on COM|PASSionate REVOLT. 

COM|PASSionately,

Traci 

The Healing Power of Reflection

Integrating yesterday, one year out from the Pulse Nightclub incident in Orlando. Listening to Spotify's "Pulse" playlist and just finishing reading an article on the need for culturally appropriate practitioners for trauma healing from the NQQTCN newsletter that showed up in my inbox. Such a wide range of ways to honor, remember, and resist. Some seemingly light and wrapped up in (I'm choosing to believe well intentioned) marketing ploys, and others steady calls for the bare minimum our communities need to just start to embark on the healing process. And wasn't this part of what hit our community so hard about the Pulse incident? It was an intersection of joy, gathering, and the hate that we're met with daily. It got juxtaposed with our country's ugly tendency to jump to any reason to justify its Islamaphobia. It reminded us that we're not safe even when we create our own spaces to gather. It was a lesson in the price of visibility.

I feel lucky that I reside in community places where these intersections and complexities were attended to, named, and called out. On top of outpourings of sadness folks in my circles called out for clarity and compassion. There was a general sentiment that you gave in the ways that you could. If you needed to share these offerings they were validated, if you needed to send them on quietly that was okay too. I know my household chose the latter. I'm finding this to be more and more my meter as I get older. We sent off a bit of tangible support, sent off as much love energy as we could muster, and then we hibernated a bit. We processed, shed some tears, and attended to some deep seeded adolescent anxiety that gets buried deep down when you're privileged enough to run into rainbow splattered Pride season gear at Target while buying paper towels.

Oh, right, this is what it still means to be a QPOC. 

I feel so lucky to be able to have a lot of the complexities of that last statement be validated in my day to day life. And even that statement gathers together such a huge group of people with so many varied experiences. It brought up the intense need for QPOC providers that this article names. It sets up the difficulty of healing when you're fighting so many other micro and macro aggressions and the heavy responsibility that's put on those that hold down those spaces. It's something that I can only try to understand as an API DFAB mental health provider where I might not be the majority, but where my identity is certainly in higher numbers than others. I often find myself caught in the struggle of feeling overwhelmed by this thought, and know that it's much more important that I attend to and move through it. 

I hope that over the course of the next few weeks, in between Pride events, and in the current state of the union, we all allow ourselves to lean into the simplicity of healing that comes with finding ourselves reflected out in the world. Whether or not you're leading the parade or can't imagine donning a feather boa in the summer heat simmer in the reflection that this time of year offers. Before you start a critical dismantling of capitalism smile at the rainbow section of Target. Before you analyze every lyric bop around to some pop music. We have so many complicated intersections to hold, sometimes we have to take the healing reflections even when they come in single dimension pieces. We can't pull back from the fight completely, this isn't an excuse for the blind eye that folks sometimes turn to intersections, there's so much more to be done, but we can allow ourselves simple retreats, access to joy, and healing in the reflections that exist so that when we re-emerge we can meet each other from more grounded places.

So one more offering of how to honor, resist and remember the atrocity that yesterday marks: Know that we have the right to access healing before we deconstruct it. We deserve to gather, dance, and lose our shit over a good DJ set. Never forget that joy has as much a place in our community as any other emotion. 

In joyous reflection,

Traci

Is Everything Still Awful?

Hey Friends,

I was thinking about messages that we sometimes need reminders about today. How sometimes try as we might things still feel, well, awful. I think it can be easy to forget when we're doing our damndest to feel better that sometimes we still don't. The irony is sometimes we end up beating ourselves up about this as well instead of taking a breath, finding some compassion, and trying to get a different perspective on things. 

I stumbled upon this old blog post from when COM|PASSionate REVOLT was a loose collective of unicorns, healers, magick makers and the like-- part of a series I used to write called "The Tarot Playshop." It was a way for us to explore/process from that place that starts with a deep breath. So just in case you need a reminder... here's a little blast from the past with lots of help from some radical tarot lovers and healers. 

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First published November 2015.

How are all you magickal queer creatures of dissent and power? Have the struggle of being unicorns in a pony world been particularly challenging as of late (Click here if "Everything is Awful")?

I hope not and, if it has, I hope that you're turning to all of the healing resources you have in your fabulous glittered fanny pack survival kits! Including, but not limited to, your tarot decks! Here are are some thoughts on the power and disclaimers of using tarot as queer folks especially when we're in particularly fragile states.

• PROS:

  • Tarot is cheap! If you can scrounge up the funds for the perfect queer tarot deck keep it nearby for quick guidance. If you can't, for the time being, there are lots of free generators to pull with online!
  • We have direct access to the wisdom of tarot! While you can pay for a reading from a fabulous fishnet fucking tarot reading femme, you can also do some reading online from your queer tarot community so you can read the cards for yourself. Still want a reading? Make sure to pick someone who is a good sparkly unicorn reflection of yourself (as well as a bit more experienced in tarot). Maybe it's a friend or an internet friend waiting to happen! No cash? Maybe they want to resource swap/trade with one of your amazing talents?
  • Tarot draws our attention to the subconscious. Sometimes when we're stuck in a rut or feel like we're hitting a wall tarot can draw our attention to something outside of our conscious frame of reference. It literally "queers" our process.

• CONS

  • A tarot deck's images are of the collective and (classically) informed by the collective culture of the time and space they were created in. That may or may not include us as we manifest right in this rainbow reflected moment. This doesn't mean these images aren't helpful, but we may have to be open to a little bit more interpretation than someone who has more majority affirmed identities.
  • Tarot isn't validated by our Western medical culture of pathology and recovery. When you go into see your psychiatrist they probably aren't going to suggest that you take a moment to take three deep breaths (same count on inhalation/exhalation) into your belly, clear some space on your bed, and pull a tarot card before popping a Xanax or offer you a discount on your next session so you can pre-order the much anticipated Slow Holler deck (Update! This deck exists and is perfect!). Probably... if your psychiatrist offers these services please let us know so that we turn our full devotion to becoming their voluntary public relations team.
  • Tarot is fueled by our energy and open to our interpretation. This means that when we're in a darker space our reads might also reflect this. There are times when all the tarot has to offer is tough love, but generally there is a super cheery pep talk in there somewhere if you look for it. However, this might pose a problem if we have challenges in finding these pieces when we're in places of depression and anxiety. While I've had readings that are pretty straight forward and heavy handed ("you don't know me, Wild Unknown Tarot and Collective Tarot!"), more often than not there are several ways I could read a spread. I try to always hold that tarot is about opening up my frame of reference not showing me walls. Furthermore, that my pulls will never show me anything that isn't already (energetically) sitting inside of me which means that I have agency over the process. So, my unicorn friends, if you're having a particularly rough day, or have just pulled a (seemingly) rough spread, or un-coincidentally, both. Take a moment to re-assess.

Overall, we think that our tarot decks are a pretty great place to turn to when everything feels awful (btw have we mentioned that we LOVE this guide?). They're also not particularly bad places to turn to when everything is going our way and we need guidance on which way to gently steer the soft pillows from heaven we seem to be floating on. It's no surprise that tarot seems to resonate with our communities because it's a queer, un-validated by the institutionalized culture, accessible, artistic, intuitive, and perfect practice... just like all of you!

In Queer Tarot Process,

Traci

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Traci {She|Her|Hers|They|Them|Theirs} is a yoga teacher, therapist and amateur tarot enthusiast! They try to believe in the power of their inner Magician, stay inspired by the Fool’s spirit, understand struggle through the lens of The Tower/Disaster and always stay reminded that, “The Star Awaits…”

**Left my old signature/sign off here because sometimes old me has some wisdom for current me as well. :)

The Silver "Bullet" of Journaling

"Mental Health" is a worthy and unpredictable opponent... or is it?

(Spoiler Alert: Yes, yes, it is.)

However, that being said, just like your favorite mythical beasts of imagination, with enough research and backstory there are in fact patterns to be found. Data can be gathered to make sense of seemingly unexpected changes in our moods, anxiety, sleep, triggers, etc. The trick is, like any good television show or movie, we often only come into thinking about our mental health when something scary or discomforting happens. Werewolves, werecougars, and shapeshifters alike, find themselves waking up confused, naked in a field, covered in blood, and picking fur out from in between incisors. This happens a couple of times, and they start to think, "Hmm... I should really figure out what's going on here."

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How often do we wakeup well rested, with a positive attitude, bodies that feel good, and think, "Hmm... I should really figure out what's going on here?" 

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It doesn't happen very often, but it should! Whether or not you're doing other healing work like therapy, getting mindful about what is and isn't nurturing to your body, what cycles are happening, and what triggers might be catching you off guard is all worthy data to have about yourself. 

How might you do that? Great question! 

Now to the rest of my metaphor... have you heard about Bullet Journaling?

It's nothing super complicated, in fact, it's innovation is in it's simplicity. It's a system to help you get organized. It combines aspects of a calendar/to do list with the option to add in other things you might want to track, remember, and/or brainstorm about. [Like, for example, flannel meme ideas.] It is also very customizable so you can figure out what works for you! You can take down your mental health werewolves.. I mean challenges... as long as you know what your silver bullet is! 

So once you get the super simple layout, take a deep breath, and then head to Pinterest to see all the ways to complicate your Bullet Journal in wonderful mental health tracking ways! 

To organizing, conquering, and understanding our inner werewolves,

Traci